The Fugly Society

Screw the castes that induce cultures, which are formed for the sake of covering their inferiority complex to exceed other caste in some way or other. And these things come out in true form when they do the search for the bride or groom hunt. These bloody people speak everything from helping poor or inter-caste marriages and laud those persons for their guts to break free from this vicious circle.

When it comes to them they won’t do the same thing which they appreciate. All they do is to try to find a better launching pad for career and life in the form of marriage and a secured life for them. Is this the reason people look forward to find another companion.

All these people should watch this Invention of Lying. I have been watching ads in a matrimony, there people’s criteria are weird enuf to get stunned or dumbfounded. I used to read better things in those funny matrimonial e-mails that used to come as forwards.

The new criteria are:

All my family is well educated and is from iits, Harvard and Wharton we are looking for someone in similar lines and good looking. [Wow this whole family has been breeding iitians it seems. Once when they draw the family tree all the fruits and branches will be iits I think. And god damn good looking somebody please define this]

I am a good-looking person, I luv greenery I have passport and driving license and I am ready to fly off. [What are you? All you want to do is escape from the poor back ground of yourself and run away]

My kid has won lot of accolades medals and stood first from the LKG till the end of the career. [What does this criterion meant?]

We hail from a family name of Blah,Blah,Blah. So… Blah blah blah…. We need blah blah blah. [People still living on the name of families. If you have achieved something your name will be enuf rather than ur families.]

Oh my god… Bloody Indian economic basic root is flawed and made everybody to earn money. Now all see money as the high priority one and they think being in IIT IIM or any branded college will help to settle life. They provide knowledge not money when they will understand. Money can’t buy everything [first of all to say this, I should have enough money but I can still say it. That’s the best part of it.]

I don’t know still might be I am offensive this is what I think. Everybody sucks big time. This society sucks real bad. So find a better sucker and settle down. Never try to change anything because it is difficult to stand against.

And stop being stereotypes and make such deals while marrying some one of.

I am angry..

The weather is beautiful and with drizzling I felt like I was on cloud nine. I am in a auto going to get my bike back then it happened. The auto wallah started arguing that I gave him wrong address and he stopped some half a kilometer ahead of the destination then I I have deducted twenty from promised one twenty rupees and gave him hundred.

Then he said he won’t accept it and started making a big issue and shouting all derogatory words. And eventually hold my collar and pulled. My surge of anger is known to only few and they still fear it. My grand ma used to say that control your anger and don’t do anything as with my personality I may kill the person.

If he might have asked more politely I might have given more but that was unfair. I hold my tongue saying anything because I wanted to make a difference between a civilized person and an uncivilized guy. Then he almost spitted on me twice. My anger reached such a peak that at least I might have called police but my senses stopped working.

With a outburst of anger I just walked while the guy still shouting all I am left with me was anger and it subsided after thirty minutes.

Now I was thinking what made me stop to react there. Is that my sanity? Or Is that my jane do attitude? Or did I fear about my status in public whom I don’t even know? or did I think that I won’t be able to tackle a guy as I think I am weak? Or Is that I don’t give a damn about such an insect? Or Is that fear that auto wallah’s have big gangs to come and beat me as they know my place? Or I usually don’t care about winning an argument with people of no use was that the reason?

But after waking up also when I remember him handling me rough my blood boils. I know he waits here only near my house at the stand. I am feeling like going and complaining on him to police at the junction or I can hit him properly. But I am not doing that. I don’t have an answer if you ask why?

I need an apology or a proper reason for his behavior yesterday. I made my temper to go calm thinking that he is in some turbulence or frustration. But, I ain’t a saint to understand that I am still suffering from anger. To err is human and if to forgive is divine is true then how can I forgive without being asked for an apology. I stepped aside and took a passive part in the argument even when he went on giving bad words. Why didn’t I hit him… why why whyw whyw.. being normal doesn’t make me anything but turbulence. I am holding my fort tight to stop over flowing of anger on any other person. I am suffering..

Is this the system that made me react like that? Am I being programmed from my childhood to fear rather than to go ahead and take a proper action? When I am in anger no sense of mine works so I usually run away from that state or the situation. But this is still burning inside. What should I do?

I am still anger……….i don’t know what I am looking for by writing this either sympathy or concern or a proper suggestion I still don’t know… I feel like I a dust speck, more fragile.